Wednesday, January 18, 2006

I am so tired in the mornings. Just want to stay under the covers and sleep all day. I make myself get up by promising myself an afternoon nap although that NEVER happens!

Am off to the gym - really do not want to go but I must. My ankles really hurt still from Mondays aerobics/gym session. This damp weather is horrible on my joints, I'm moving like a very old woman.

Made a big decision last night; I'm asking P & M on the Cafe to find someone else to do Centre Stage. I'm finding it harder and harder to do. It's harder to get people to agree to do it; even if they say yes they often don't come through with an article so I have to press them (which I HATE doing) and then it's hard to drum up questions afterwards. I'm sure there are eager Mods just waiting to leap into my shoes! To be honest I've lost heart for it and it's started to be something I totally dread instead of something I really enjoyed.

No-one on the Cafe ever responded properly to my repeated posts on "what's happening in the future"; if there is any planning for the site being done I'm left out of it. The Lounge used to be a lively and active area now it's almost moribund. No-one asks for my input or my opinion, I'm like a blue ghost wandering the halls and it's a weird feeling; I loved that site once and thought I had so many friends there. But many of the familiar faces have left, drifted away or appear only seldom; instead there are hordes of new people who appear and disappear and only a few linger long enough to make an impression. The site is certainly growing fast which is great but the sense of a real community has (IMHO) vanished. I feel this is because the heart of the site (the mods and admin teams) is still fragmented. Maybe if I resign as a Mod they'd start taking openly in the Lounge again? Who knows?

It's starting to hurt less though (hurray) and I'm not worrying over it so much any more. Which is good.

Time to head for the gym...

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