Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Blissful Artist gave me this lovely award! Thank you so much. I hope all the regular visitors to my blog will be "friends forever" so please, accept this award from me with love!

I've been feeling vaguely uneasy because there is "CHANGE" looming and I don't do well with change. I like things to stay pretty much the same and things have changed a lot for me in the past year. Some of it has been good (like my wedding photography) but some of it very hard to bear (like Karen's death and the loss of another friendship that meant a lot to me).

I suppose I don't like change because often I can't control it and I need to feel in control to feel safe. I'm trying to change this attitude and let things unfold, to accept I can't (and shouldn't) ever be able to control everything in my life.

Anyway, this latest change may seem rather minor but it's bothering me. The riding school Sian goes to is up for sale. It's the same place I do RDA. There are no guarantees the school will continue. Sian is really upset - this is the third school to close while she's been there. I'm really sad as RDA may finish if the school becomes a livery establishment or if the new owners don't want to support RDA.

It's all so uncertain...I think it's that which is "getting to me" rather than the change. We don't know what will happen or when. The worrying thing is that there are rumours that the horses are all up for sale, including my darling Bruno. I'm not sure if I should start looking for a new place for Sian now or let things go a little longer. What to do, what to do....

Well, nothing I can do will alter what's to happen so I had better just try to accept it and trust that whatever the outcome, as my guru Susan Jeffers says - "I'll handle it".

9 comments:

bigbucketgirl said...

From one compulsive worrier to another...i hope it sorts itself sooner rather than later, for you and your daughter. I only found your blog today but will pop back!

artisbliss said...

It's almost worse to wonder what's going to happen than to actually go through the process of change itself. "Hanging fire", my mom calls it.

photowannabe said...

I'm not wild about change either. I guess I don't want to be kept on my toes all the time....
I do hope things will work out for you and you will still be able to ride.

Akelamalu said...

It is a worry when big changes are in the offing, but as you say there's not a lot you can do about it. Take the 'what will be, will be' attitude and stop worrying until it happens honey.

Thanks for the award I'll add it to my growing collection and display it with pride in my trophy room. :)

Dianne said...

I worry about everything I can't control (which is a lot) and then I worry about the worrying.

I get it :)

Now stop it ;)

your winning photos are amazing!! I'm so proud.

picperfic said...

everything happens for a reason J...it will all work out! x

JAM said...

I can see worrying about this. This is a positive thing in your's and your daughter's lives. The possibility of something you love like that coming to an end is disheartening.

I've always heard, "If God closes a door, he'll open a window." In my life, this has invariably been true. I've even gotten to the point that where I sometimes even get excited because I know that something good is about to happen, after another thing has left my life. I've had some wonderful blessings happen right after job losses and things like that. Looking back, the changes usually ended up being perfect.

Good luck.

Faye Pekas said...

Change is worrysome to me too but having lived through many years of life changes, I realize that something good always comes from change. As much as you love working in the RDA program, if it is discontinued you will find another way to make a difference in people's lives. And you can remember the people you have already made a difference for while working with them in the program.

Whatever happens you won't only "handle it" you will come out stronger on the other side..

(((((((((hug)))))))))))))

Kerri said...

What a lovely award!!

I can really relate to what you are saying about change...oh I am SO much one who needs to be in control! And we must face it...there are some things that are just so totally out of our control. I do hope there is a good outcome!!